4 symptoms of bitterness/offense: 1) Do you have lingering anger towards someone? If you are waiting for an apology in order to forgive, don't hold your breath. Keep in mind the power to forgive doesn't come from an apology it comes from Christ. 2) Do you rejoice at someone's misfortune? 3) Do you frequently speak negatively about someone? 4) Do you try to turn others against them? Find friends who point you towards wholeness not feed your grudges. Make sure you give your angry words to God so you don't give them to someone you shouldn't.